Scar Tissue

Any patch, on any repair, requires the addition of extra material to cover and protect the wounded area. The result of such a repairs results in a toughening of the compromised area so it will not fail again or cause failure to the unit is a part of. No matter how much integrity the wounded area once had it is now a point of weakness. The patch is a physical display of where the wound is and an area that may need defending. The same can said of emotions, even if there is no physical patch that you can see.

In male culture, it is unmanly to show signs of weakness. Exposing your vulnerabilities is something that is not done. Live long enough and you will find someone that you can think you can confide in you can expose your weakness too in the name of honesty. For a man with any honor, truthfulness is a high quality that they try to live up to. If lucky he would have chosen the right person and never have his weakness used against him. If not he feels compelled to suffer the anguish alone while giving the appearance of being unscathed.

If you get into a conversation with such a man you will find that he picks up on certain things, a look, a reaction. All of a sudden he appears to be very insightful into emotional pain which surprises since he appears bulletproof. What he has done is pick up on something he feels like he wants to do but is compelled not too. His insights are based on his own experience and he has milled over on his own to find a way out. Males who don’t find that way out see death as their only release. Statistically males are more prone to suicide. For those who have been emotionally destroyed, there is no experience sharing because to do that would be to expose the wound but they are very mindful of seeing it in others. The trick is trying to approach those males without them losing face of compromising their manliness.

If you are bless with their admission of weakness they are displaying a level of trust in you that is beyond all measure. During this process you will find them asking weird questions which, on face value, appear to be confusing. What is being done is an assessment of how much value they are too you. They are defending that wound now covered in scar tissue. At that moment they are admitting they are human.